Remember or Dwell

It is an amazing thing our mind.  It records everything.. but we only recall with regularlity that which has some kind of an emotional attachment. Unfortunately, that does not have to be a positive thing.  We can attach negative emotions.

Remembering where we have been is an important aspect. It is how we learn.  It is how we avoid repeating past mistakes.  Unfortunately, for many of us, rather then using this tool our mind gives us, we begin to dwell.

What is the difference?
Dwelling is allowing a negative memory to take root and take over.  Rather then moving forward with the lesson learned, we are suddenly angered in the past.  We rehash it over and over and over. We relive that pain and hurt again and again. To what end?? The truth is kind of scary. Because at some level we have become to believe we deserve it.  Only when we realize that we should only have to pay for errors one time, do we stop this hurtful pattern of self abuse.

Dwelling can become so powerful that it can create stress caused illnesses and depression.  Ulcers, heart disease, high blood pressure and many other ailments have been tied to staying in an increased stress state.  And the worst part is, most of us do this to ourselves.

How do I stop this?
 There are two major tools one can use.  First, the old cliche .. Let go and Let God.  The second thing is refuse to allow negativity to control your thinking.  The one thing that is almost possible to take away from man is his thoughts. You may lock away his body and still his mind is his own.  Even under the influence of the disease of addiction, there is still influence on thought.  When you catch yourself thinking in a negative manner; tell yourself .. STOP!  We are trained this word from a very  young age.   It will startle the mind for a brief moment. Then pick up something postive; a story, affirmations or a thank you letter.  Anything that has hope, peace or love within it.  This change in thinking will force the mind slowly to let go of the negative things in our past and move towards acceptance.


Remember.. do not dwell.  There is freedom to move forward with the assurance of not repeating a past mistake.

Make Today. .. just a little better then yesterday and your future will always be moving forward.

God Bless

Emotional Management a Must in Business!

Managing emotions is an arduous task for some but a skill that is essential to success in business and personal relationships. We all have and experience emotions whether we like it or not. Managing emotions mainly deals with unpleasant emotions: anger, fear, frustration, depression, despair. Emotions are the feelings we experience day to day, such as happiness, pride, boredom, sadness, anger and frustration. Emotions are a part of our everyday existence as they move through the body, affecting our state-of-mind, performance, health and energy. Emotions cannot be helped. Emotions we don't even realize we are feeling can influence our thoughts and behaviors; they can also travel from person to person like a virus. Due to this virus like state, it is of the most upmost importance for those in positions of influence not only their own emotions but understand the need to monitor and perhaps influence the moods of others.

Management is in a unique position to dictate the pulse and rhythm in their workplace. "We engage in emotional contagion," says Sigal Barsade, a Wharton management professor who studies the influence of emotions on the workplace. Broken promises, laying the blame on others, dishonest communications, and ignoring employee suggestions are all unfortunately very commonplace in real world management. So how does management expect their employees to manage their emotions in the workplace if the tone that is being set is negative or one of disregard? Without that emotional-management component, a work environment can become toxic.

Those in leadership positions are often not really good at working with people and so spend a lot of their time avoiding and/or strategizing how to deal with, avoid, or get rid of those who are troubling. In fact a great deal of leadership is actually about emotion management. Emotions are also essential to inspirational leadership. These managers often lack the necessary people skills, communication skills and leadership skills to influence the emotional tone of the workplace. This is a critical oversight by those in upper management who do not get or provide the training to create a positive emotional tone. So in turn, employees’ moods, emotions, and overall dispositions impact job performance, decision making, creativity, turnover, teamwork, negotiations and leadership.

For Management to be in complete control of emotions of the workplace, they need to be a master of themselves, both theirs and their employees'. It is essential for employees to positive at work -- but this has to be supported by upper management. Employees need positive feedback, and if they do not see that coming, or do not even get acknowledged for their work, they will look elsewhere. This creates turnover and increased costs and lowered performance. Many employers in the current economy are quick to just higher someone else rather than address this aspect. They fail to look at the long term costs of losing an employee in downtime and in the retraining of a new employee.

One of the most fundamental things necessary to improve employees' attitude and to create a “culture of love,” is to adopt systems that recognize and reward those positive attitudes and behaviors. When managers are manipulative and treat employees just as "equipment" rather than humans beings, poor attitudes follow. And a workplace where emotions run rampant can turn off employees, vendors and customers alike. Similarly, it is the duty of the manager to ensure that he manages the negative emotional attitudes of his team in such a way that such attitudes are not reflected in their performance. Managers also need to learn how to lead by the example they set -how to deal with their own pain in positive ways that can inspire others to deal differently with their own difficult situations. Barsade gave the example of a manager who was dragged down at the start of every day when passing by the desk of an employee who either grunted or gave no acknowledgement. The manager took control and simply started following a different route through the office. If the company is losing money and experiencing the effects of downsizing, should the manager, feeling stressed and overwhelmed, convey his despair to his workers. Or should the manager try to appear cheerful and act as if nothing is wrong. Barsade says it's possible for the manager to convey emotions that are both authentic and positive, saying something like, "I know you're worried. The ability to summon positive emotions during trying times of stress is the key to being a successful manager.

Most organizations have traditionally focused on teaching logical and rational thinking and have neglected emotional learning in their development programs. The main implication is that organizations should focus on hiring managers with high emotional and social competence and also provide EI training and development opportunities to managers to enable them create a positive organizational climate. Effective listening is an important aspect of learning to do that as well.

Listening effectively is difficult because people vary in their communication skills and in how clearly they express themselves, and often has different needs, wants and purposes for interacting. Still, listening is an important skill and needs to be taught. The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and to be understood. Feedback must take into account the needs of both the giver and the receiver. Otherwise, it can be destructive when it fails to consider the needs and feelings of everyone involved. Listen to words, body language and emotions to understand the player's both conscious and unconscious needs. By feeling heard, many negative consequences of a disgruntled or upset employee can be lowered if not stopped all together.

Managing emotions does not mean denying their existence or ignoring them. Never tell an employee he should not feel that way. Feelings are a biological reaction a circumstance, event or stressor and cannot be helped. How one can help is to acknowledge the feelings and help the employee consider positive possible choices they have to resolve their current feelings. Take a minute to consider the importance of active listening by thinking about how you can be a good active listener in terms of body language--or what you do during communication, voice--how you respond to the speaker, and content --what you say when you respond to the speaker. Active listening is an effective tool to reduce the emotionality of a situation. Every manager or sales team leader that can learn these skills will find that their team will overall increase in company loyalty and performance. Managing emotions is something that must be addressed, not avoided for success.

World Vision - My Charity of Choice

I have been a sponser of a World Vision child for Two years now. I want to help do more. Clean water, schools and a chance at a future are so important. Join me and help me raise $1,000000.00 for this vital organization.

Here is some information from them and please go look at their page worldvision.org if you are unfamiliar.

The Need
Today, more than 26,000 children under age 5 will die from preventable or treatable causes — that means an estimated 9.7 million children in this age group will die this year. And the vast majority of all child deaths occur in developing countries.

There may be cures for their conditions, but they don't have access to the necessary medication, treatment, or immunizations.

Their parents may lack basic knowledge of nutrition, hygiene, and health care. And their governments don’t have the resources to provide adequate health programs. When parents aren't healthy, they can’t provide for their families’ needs. And when children aren’t healthy, they can't attend school or focus on their future.

Fast Facts
Every day, more than 26,000 children under the age of five die, mostly from preventable causes.

More than 25 percent of the world’s infants are not immunized with critical vaccines that cost about $1.



World Vision’s Response
World Vision helps bring medical care and increased knowledge of health, nutrition, and hygiene to children and families in need through these interventions:

Emergency medical care
Health clinics and therapeutic feeding centers | Last year, World Vision teams helped 9.7 million victims of disasters and humanitarian crises in more than 50 countries. Emergency clinics enable staff to care for critical medical needs.
Medical supplies | World Vision helps facilitate emergency care by providing hospitals and clinics with top-quality medicines, equipment, and supplies.
Training
Health care | World Vision trains birth attendants and health workers in places like Ghana where people might not otherwise have access to health care.
Hygiene | Community programs teach the importance of personal hygiene in preventing disease.
Nutrition | World Vision volunteers and staff train parents in the critical role of healthy foods and nutrients in the diets of growing children.
Access to health resources
Immunization and early childhood care | World Vision provides children around the world with vaccines, vitamin A, and nutritional supplements, and supports mothers through pregnancy and childbirth.
Health clinics | World Vision works to ensure access to health care for people in impoverished countries like Romania, where years of oppressive leadership drained the country of medical professionals.
Preventative care | World Vision focuses on the prevention of childhood diseases through prenatal care and well-child care programs in countries worldwide.
Hygiene supplies | Families in need are given essential supplies like soap, shampoo, and toothpaste to help stave off serious diseases.
Advocacy | World Vision seeks to play a leadership role in advocacy and policy improvements for health reform at global and national levels.
Through all of its health and hygiene interventions, World Vision works to enhance the quality of life for children and their families in order to help them reach their God-given potential.


Your Opportunity to Help
You can help children survive and thrive by providing access to vaccinations, medical care, and health training for their communities.

Your gift will make an impact. For example:
$25 sends lifesaving immunizations and healthcare for needy children and families.
$80 ships vital medicines and healthcare supplies to help save the lives of children in 36 countries.
A gift of any amount will enable response to the most urgent health needs of the communities we serve.

Balance through Financial Freedom

So many Entrepreneurs spend their days after every dollar that they miss the most precious of success' gifts - Freedom!

What are you working for? If it is for a bottom line be careful that you do not look back with regret. Live a life of balance that insures that every day is a life of memory.

Spirit/Emotional- nourish your spirit however you define it. This does not have to mean a religious nourishment. What do you do to take time to enjoy the moment of the day? When was the last time you held hands as the sun set? When was the last time your spirit felt peace and awe? There is nothing so precious as a baby's first giggle. Your child's first goal. The site of puppies frolicking. Take time to nourish what is the most important thing you have - YOU!



Mental - Learn, never stop learning! Business, relationships, life in general changes. Each of us must grow and change with the world around us. If we do not, we will find that our relationships out grow us. Our businesses will be left in the dust as we remain in antiquated strategies. Never stop learning. A life of freedom, prosperity and nourisment depends on it.


Physical - Take care of yourself physically. Eat right! Take Vitamins - the toxicity in our environment and lack of nourishment in food today is a documented fact. Do what you can to exercise even if it is just moving between business calls. If you do not feel at your best, then you will not be all that you wish for family, self or business.

Social - Do not put off your "I love You's" You never know what time you have on this world. You never know for tomorrow is not promised to any of us. Spend time with people. If you wait "till we can afford to" - you may never do it.

I realized the importance of all this personally as I had the opportunity to see Mount Rushmore with my daughter and granddaughter this summer. I was always saying some day and I did not get to have my sons on that trip. I put it off till "I could afford it." Memories that will not be forgotten and a lesson I am passing on! Work like your world depends on it... but then.. take time to be healthy enough to enjoy it.

www.balancedfreedom.com