"Have One Week, Will Relax"

Your 7 days program to Stress management

They say there's more than one way to skin a cat. The same goes when you start tearing your hair out with all the frustration, grief, anxiety, and yes, stress. It's a state of mental conditioning that is like taking that bitter pill down your throat, causing you to lose your sense of self, and worse your sanity. Just thinking about it can drive anyone off the edge.

And they say that the proactive ones are already living off the edge.

As one stressed-out person to another, I know how it feels, and believe me there are many variants when it comes to stress. Coping with life, and carrying the problems that may or may not belong to you can scratch away the little joy and happiness that you can carry once you head out that door. You can't blame them for being like that; they have their own reasons, so much like we have our reasons to allow stress to weigh us down. They say that stress is all in the mind, well, what's bugging you anyway?

There are several ways to manage stress, and eventually remove it out of your life one of these days. So I'll try to divide it into a seven-day course for you and I promise it's not going to be too taxing on the body, as well as on the mind.

1. Acknowledge stress is good
Make stress your friend! Based on the body's natural "fight or flight" response, that burst of energy will enhance your performance at the right moment. I've yet to see a top sportsman totally relaxed before a big competition. Use stress wisely to push yourself that little bit harder when it counts most.

2. Avoid stress sneezers
Stressed people sneeze stress germs indiscriminately and before you know it, you are infected too!

Protect yourself by recognizing stress in others and limiting your contact with them. Or if you've got the inclination, play stress doctor and teach them how to better manage themselves.

3. Learn from the best
When people around are losing their head, who keeps calm? What are they doing differently? What is their attitude? What language do they use? Are they trained and experienced?
Figure it out from afar or sit them down for a chat. Learn from the best stress managers and copy what they do.

4. Practice socially acceptable heavy breathing
This is something I've learned from a gym instructor: You can trick your body into relaxing by using heavy breathing. Breathe in slowly for a count of 7 then breathe out for a count of 11. Repeat the 7-11 breathing until your heart rate slows down, your sweaty palms dry off and things start to feel more normal.

5. Give stressy thoughts the red light
It is possible to tangle yourself up in a stress knot all by yourself. "If this happens, then that might happen and then we're all up the creek!" Most of these things never happen, so why waste all that energy worrying needlessly?

Give stress thought-trains the red light and stop them in their tracks. Okay so it might go wrong - how likely is that, and what can you do to prevent it?

6. Know your trigger points and hot spots
Presentations, interviews, meetings, giving difficult feedback, tight deadlines…. My heart rate is cranking up just writing these down!

Make your own list of stress trigger points or hot spots. Be specific. Is it only presentations to a certain audience that get you worked up? Does one project cause more stress than another? Did you drink too much coffee?

Knowing what causes you stress is powerful information, as you can take action to make it less stressful. Do you need to learn some new skills? Do you need extra resources? Do you need to switch to decaf?

7. Burn the candle at one end
Lack of sleep, poor diet and no exercise wreaks havoc on our body and mind. Kind of obvious, but worth mentioning as it's often ignored as a stress management technique. Listen to your mother and don't burn the candle at both ends!

So having stress can be a total drag, but that should not hinder us to find the inner peace of mind that we have wanted for a long time. In any case, one could always go to the Bahamas and bask under the summer sun.

Act AS If.. do not mourn have not!

If you want a quality, act as if you already had it.

- William James


This Quote Reminds me of my article I did about the brain being like a smart bomb. Affirmations are also built on this concept. When we act as if we have ________ it is not long before life somehow fills it in for us. Act as if your happy, and unless you have a medical condition that impairs this, you will find yourself having more and more moments of happiness. Act as if you are deserving of success and success will find you.

The law of attraction has never been disproved. Like attracts like and there is also proof that the brain releases energy. For example, one test done was when a priest blesses water, the vibrations in the water actually change. We are more powerful and more deserving then we believe. The question of the day is... Do you believe?

"Life With Woody" 10 inspirational quotes than can improve yourself

(A friend sent this to me and gave me permission to share it. They have rights. I liked it and thought it fit into what I love to share with you all)

How do people go through the usual part of life when faced with vein-popping stress? I mean, the new age thing like Zen or yoga is one of the good things and it actually works. Is there room for the intellectual side of people who can actually smell the roses-in-a-can while on the move? It kind of had me thinking that there really must be something in this 'mind-over-matter' thing.

Humor is indeed the best medicine there is whenever you are. I mean anyone can pay good money to listen to a comedian just to make you wet your pants after laughing so hard. Despite of what's been happening, and to those who has gone though the ordeal, it's better to just laugh while facing the troubles with a clear mind than anger with a clouded vision. One of my favorite celebrities of all time may have to be Woody Allen. Now this is one guy who gives you the in-your-face bluntness that he pulls out with gusto, even without even trying. You can talk just about anything with a man, and he's bound to mock the subject and you'll end up laughing rather than being upset about it.

Woody Allen has this to say:

1. "Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons." It sounds good to me, I mean the practicality of all things does involve money but it doesn't have to take an arm and a leg to get it.

2. "I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government." 'Nuff said.

3. "There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?" This happens to be one of the classic ones. I mean the issue about life's little problems isn't all that bad, until 'he' shows up.

Sure, relationships can get complicated, or does have its complications that probably any author about relationships is bound to discover it soon. We follow what our heart desires, unless you're talking about the heart as in the heart that pump blood throughout your body.

4. "Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions." And if you want more, just keep on asking!

5. "A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'." It sounds, 'practical', I think.

And when it comes to everyday life, he really knows how to make the best out of every possible scenario, and it doesn't involve a lawsuit if he strikes a nerve.

6. "Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats." I never had a boat in my bathtub before. Just staring at it while soaking in hot water makes me seasick already.

7. "I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens." If it rains, it pours.

8. "I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose." It could get worse when you're guzzling on beer… or mouthwash, and it happened to me once!

9. "If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans." At least he doesn't smite us with lightning, and I'm thankful for that.

And despite of what may happen to all of us in the next ten, twenty, or even thirty years, I guess we all have to see things in a different kind of light and not just perspective. I can't seem to imagine life without any piece of wisdom that could guide us. Whether we're religious or not, it takes more courage to accept your fears and learn how to deal with them is all that matters when it comes to even just getting along.

And to sum things up, here is the last nugget of wisdom to go by… however, whenever, and wherever we may be.

10. "The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have."

That is it, that is the ten my friend sent to me. However, I would like to point out that laughter does release neurotransmitters that are responsible for easing stress and that feel good feeling. So maybe... laughter really IS the best medicine. Test it for yourself, make yourself laugh right now. Go on, don't feel stupid. Get that belly laugh rolling... and see if YOU don't feel better.

Have a prosperous day!

If You Are Not Loving Life Than Change Your Point of View

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Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts, shared that, "Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars."-

In a writing contest, if you’ve placed second, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again?

Life is filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimist’s route and take a challenging and fulfilling life.

So why nurture an optimist’s point of view? And why now?

Well, optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma.

On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife’s disorder but also a teen-ager’s disorder’ as well.

Here’s how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist:

Optimists expect the best

The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do, are their own fault.

The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune---it’s the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case.

Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder.

They won’t say “things will never get better,” “If I failed once, it will happen again” and “If I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.”

Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.

People respond positively to optimists

Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.

Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.

In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.

When the going gets tough, optimists get tougher

Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.

They persevere. They just don’t give up easily, they are also known for their patience. Inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.

Optimists are healthier and live longer

Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.

Optimists’ health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. And they get to outlive those prone to negative thoughts.

So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.

Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but don’t just stay there. Carry yourself out of the mud and improve your chances of getting back on the right track. And why not inspire others to remove their dark-colored glasses and see life in the bright side?

If At First You Don't Suceed....

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Every failure is a step to success.

- William Whewell


My Grandmother used to irritate me as a child when I would get frustrated and want to quit. She would always say .. "If at first you don't succeed, try try again." I do not know where that quote comes from, but as a child, I would have loved to kick them in the knee. Now, older and wiser, I see what my grandmother tried so hard to teach me. Success that comes easy is not nearly as valued as that success which eludes us for a time but then we overcome and achieve.

There is deep satisfaction in rising to a challenge and discover that you can overcome an obstacle or learn something that seemed out of reach. The things I have gained easily in life are treated more with an easy come.. easy go mentality. We see that in marriages today. Little effort is made to save them. The road gets hard and the two part paths. One cannot help but wonder how different our country would be today if people figured out how to work and live together.

Do not count your failures, count your steps to success. Each painful step, each back breaking lesson, each heartbreaking loss makes the victory just that much sweeter.

Have A Prosperous and Balanced Day!

Internal Motivation versus External Motivation

Strong reasons make strong actions.

- William Shakespeare


Having troubles succeeding at something? First question you need to ask is what is motivating you. If it is outside YOU such as another person's desires, bills or even society; it is almost impossible to really find what you are looking for in life. The first ingredient for success at anything whether it be recovery from addiction or $100,000 in the bank is a strong reason for doing so and being able to name that desire.

One you have an internal reason for anything, the brain has a much easier time helping problem solve possible solutions and paths for achievement. When a roadblock shows up or a set back, you will push through rather then give up because it is YOUR reason you are working for.

So today's ingredient for success and balance is.... what do you want and why do you want it? It is the first step to reaching any goal.

Thought of the Day - December 17th

Knowledge is the treasure of a wise man.

- William Penn


Education is the most important thing we have has humans. We pass down our growth and discoveries in every category of life. No one can speak higher of the need to get an education then I. However, here is a shock. I do not believe that it necessarily need to be within a four year institution.

Depending on your career choices, an internship or apprenticeship may be far more valuable in your time spent. In this case, education needs to be gained to fill in the gaps that such types of informal education bring. Our libraries are full of human treasure of thought, insight and wisdom. Colleges offer day type seminar courses. Then of course, there is here on the internet. Be careful here, anyone can put up a website. Make sure your source of information is legetimate. For example, when I wrote my blog on 2012, I made sure to research on sites like NASA and not fan mail from the film.

Two small points I wish to make on this topic today. The first it that there is one area where man refuses to learn from past great minds. When it comes to happiness and personal success, it seems like we are forever reinventing the wheel. Yet centuries of great minds have told us many such things. Early to bed.... or Neither a lender or borrow be.... We know the sayings, yet we do not follow them. We think somehow the formula for us is different. Even I fell prayer to this view of terminal uniquiness. How could someone know from 200 years ago what would possibly help me find happiness today? But the truth is, they did and do. Things such as not taking others BS personally or to understand that each individual has value and has nothing to prove to anyone but themselves. People go to seminars to learn more about success and happiness and learn the concept of self-affirmation. A free topic taught everywhere yet somehow not believed.

The other point I would like to make is that many individuals do not keep learning past retirement. Without continue stimulation, the mind whithers far more easily. This lack of mental challenge and/or goals for after retirement has led to a quick end for many of our older citizens. If you are approaching retirement, NEVER stop learning. Find a topic that interests you and get involved. Do not stop working and then wither away in front of a television set. Your generation has too much to offer to us younger individuals who still are living with the misconception that time old wisdom couldn't possibly apply to us!